The cycle of drive

Have you lost the passion in your work?
Have you lost the original purpose of working?
Where are the dreams and ideals?
Has cynicism tame you and hope deserted you?
Do you feel like running away from it all and escape from reality?

The last 2 wks, i just lost my drive...
It's like forever running without an finishing line and i just got tired along the way.

Sometimes i wonder how does people last so long in their job. Have they given up hope and resign to fate or is it an responsibility to their family that they just continue on and dreams? what dreams they say.

The last 2 wks, i just put down whatever i'm doing and stoned.
lazing around the house and wasting my time away watching cable when i usually spend it on my japanese revision and books. i just don't feel like doing anything at all. deep in my mind, i know that i shouldn't be doing it but i just don't have the drive. I even felt guilty and wondering what the hell am i doing.

i realised that i will sometimes go thru cycles of drive like this. i get depressed and burn out. I just sink to the rock bottom and pity at my own mediocre life and the inability to translate into action.

when i do hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up. there's just no any lower that i can sink to. then i just find my strength back again and face the world chin up, wind in my face. with every cycle passed, i become a little bit stronger as the hole sinks deeper.

Mar 22nd was the 2nd yr death anniversary of my brother in law. thou we're not that close, i still miss him because of the kids. whenever i look at my nephew and niece, it'll reminds me that they could have so much more with the father around. i think to myself, if it happens to me, do i have the strength to face the world like they are doing ? my family is so tightknitted that they've become like my children and like a father, there's so much i will do for my child and that is why i always felt so sad. seeing them without the dad.

in times like this, i realised that i have an additional responsibility, to make the best of out my life so that i could make the best out of them. just like when my nephew was still a 2yr old, standing by the door waving me goodbye as i left for work. the world's problems seem to fade away and nothing else matters.

and in times like this, all the struggles that i'm currently going thru seem inconsequential.

Air Ticket to Hanoi - Tiger Airways vs SQ

hmmm, i was checking out the prices for air tics to hanoi for a short trip in Apr so i check out a few airlines. first stop was to MISA Travels, the website that i always get my airtics from as i've always planned my own itinerary and do everything online. the shop is located at Fook Hai Building next to Chinatown Point Complex. anyway, i've check out the prices from the site and compared to budget airlines. this is how it goes...

if you book your tics thru budget airlines aka tiger airways etc, you would realise that if you get your tics more than 1 month before your departure date, the tics will be very cheap but as the dates draws nearer or less than a month, that's when it gets ridiculous.

i've checkout tiger airways' prices in late feb and it's online website quotes me $330 incl of taxes per pax. it's 'reasonable' considering the fact that there are not many airlines that flies to hanoi. however, i saw from MISA that Vietnam airlines cost only $210 excl taxes but the price is valid till end Mar but i'm departing in Apr so i decided to take my chances and wait for the new fares from Vietairs. finally today, the prices is out and thank goodness, there's no change to the prices so i'm taking Vietnam Airlines which departs from terminal 1 and it only cost $350 incl taxes.

Being curious, i decided to check out Tigerairways for the latest price as it's now less than a month to my departure date on the 5th Apr. To my dismay, shock etc. i'm utterly disgusted to find out the Tigerairs is now charging $498.48 to fly to Hanoi. THAT'S FREAKING CLOSE TO $500!!! and it's to hanoi!!! not even hong kong or taipei for goodness sake.

now, Tigerairways being a subsidiary of Singapore Airways, i decided to check out the prices of the parent company. by the way, SQ flies to hanoi instead of silkair. hmmm, MISA online quotes $375 excl taxes for 2 to travel and $293 for 4 to travel. If you adds up the taxes about $110, flying by the world class SQ to hanoi is ONLY $485 and $403 respectively!!!

u pay less, u get to fly SQ, u get to depart and enjoy the facilities from terminal 2, there's a aerobridge linking to the plane instead of the budget terminal where u got to walk and climb stairs to the plane. if you're picky, the check in counter issues you a computer printed boarding pass instead of the handwritten ones and best of all, u got inflight meals and entertainment compared to the miserable budget airlines. eh, air stewardness's better??? [that's debatable :) ]

ah, that's ridiculous! i mean when they set the prices, don't they ever think before hand? if it's comparable or more expensive than full fares airlines then why the hell it's call budget airlines? aren't they supposed to be cheaper even though it's less than a month before departure? well, i've not even started comparing with Vietnam Airs... yet.